Monday, May 21

Is that just a simple lie or there's more to it

I'm struggling hard.
Well, everyone is struggling hard not only me.
It hit me very badly.
It hurts so much that I never know that you're actually that important in my life.
That I lose my interest in everything.
But then again, I don't blame you for that.
Its just me being stupid holding on.
And probably I deserve it.

I guess everybody saw it coming, was too blind, far too blind.
I'm just fooling myself.
Pretending and all.
Thinking everything will stay.
It will still be the same.
But now, everything's too late.
But let's just take it as a lesson learnt.

It took me long enough to wake up.
Eventually, it's gonna fade with time, i know i am going to be fine after that.
I promised everyone time and time again.
Each time the promises gets broken by myself.
Its just too hard.
Yet again, I'm back to square one.

The promises does not seem realistic anymore.
It seems so fake.
I do wonder how come some people just live on life like nothing happened.
Do you mean what you said?
Do you really mean all those words?

Eh, I've been in this thing for far too long and its time to get out.
Before its really going to affect my n's.
Cause I just do not have the mood to study at all.
Not even in the mood for anything.
Really, I promised all those close ones, those around me that I will let this go.
Let myself start to concentrate and study.
Everyone did not believe me.
No one did.

I'm sorry for time and time again I broke the promises I make to you all.
You should know who you are.
Thanks for those talks. (it really was great!)
Thanks for those time being there for me no matter how busy you guys are.
This time I will really try and give me best.
Because I know there is no time to waste.
And not forgetting giving in to me endlessly.

4:02 PM